Can Twinkies and lazy workouts really get you a body like Teyana Taylor?
After the world got an eyeful of Teyana Taylor’s bangin’ post-baby body in Kanye West’s ‘Fade’ video during the MTV Video Music Awards this week, everyone immediately wanted to know what her secret was.
Because god damn, that girl is FIT.
Was it Mauy Thai? Was it two hours of spin every day? Was it high protein, no carb, no dairy? Was it pilates and yogalates and almond milk lattes?
There are currently no fewer than 368,000 results on Google News for “Teyana Taylor body” because women around the world could not search her name for fitspo quick enough.
But when the “secret” behind Teyana’s rock-hard rig was finally revealed, it could not have been more surprising, or frankly, disappointing.
Here are just some of the things the 26-year-old said about her fitness and diet regime:
• “I would be lying if I told you I had hardcore workouts, because I really, really don’t.”
• “I do the lazy workouts. Even squats hurt for me.”
• “I wouldn’t know how to tell you how to work out.”
• “I’m allergic to vegetables.”
• “’I’m more of a fried chicken, baked macaroni (kind of girl) —I eat everything.
• “I don’t eat healthy at all.”
• “I eat Twinkies and all this s**t”
An ‘insider’ also told E! News: “Eating healthy is not her thing. She is the kind of girl that eats donuts and candy for breakfast. She just doesn’t gain weight.”
Oh and did we mention that Teyana is also a new mum who gave birth to her daughter Iman Taylor Shumpert Jr. just eight months ago? Oh and that she didn’t even have the luxury of any prep time for the video because Kanye only approached her three weeks prior to it being filmed?
Hell, if all I ate was Twinkies and fried chicken and barely worked out, I would look like a potato by next week.
Teyana’s comments are the perfect example of the excruciating rise of the celebrity humble brag.
The size zero star that says, “Oh, I hate the gym, I barely work out” or the actress that confesses, “I am obsessed with chocolate, I eat it every day” or the model who tries to convince us, “I’m lucky, I can eat whatever I want”.
Why do women these days feel they need to embellish or lie about what they really eat to seem relatable? Why is it that the fitter and thinner a female celebrity is, the more she seems to feel the need to tell us about all the cheat meals she’s had and that she never goes to the gym?
It’s as if celebrities feel like it’s a weakness to admit how hard they’ve worked and how little they ate to get what they’ve got.
For most of us who want a body like Teyana Taylor, it takes a serious amount of discipline, a lot of weights, countless hours in the gym and a lot of small portions of chicken breast and broccoli.
Because unlike Teyana, those of us in the real world who have a desk job and a social life know that it’s nigh on impossible to eat Twinkies and do a “lazy” workout and look like the star of a Kanye West video.
We’re not saying Teyana wasn’t born having hit the genepool jackpot that made her a “6-year-old with a six pack”, but perhaps there’s a little more work that went on behind the scenes.
How many hours does she dance for a day? How long does she spend doing her “lazy” workouts? What does “lazy” actually even mean? Is her version of lazy the same as mine? Does she really eat macaroni and cheese and fried chicken for every meal?
The problem is that by making a physique like Teyana’s sound so effortless and achievable, it makes us mere mortals doing our best with a gym membership and a packet of steamed veg for lunch feel like we’ve failed.
Getting a ‘Fade’ body for most of us would be virtually unattainable, let alone thinking it’s possible to do it with a mouth full of Twinkies and a few dance moves every day.
By contrast, the world breathed a collective sigh of relief when celebrity chef Wolfgang Puck revealed that size zero hero Victoria Beckham only eats a plate of spinach with a pinch of salt when she goes out to dinner.
It was the same for Amanda Seyfried who was forced to slim down even more for 2009 film ‘Chloe’. “It’s intense. And sort of awful,” she told Esquire of the raw diet she was on. “Yesterday for lunch? Spinach. Just spinach, spinach and some seeds.”
Furthermore, there was nothing more refreshing to hear than when Anne Hathaway admitted to Allure magazine that she lived on radishes and hummus and “went into the gym for 10 months and didn’t come out” in an effort to fit into her Catwoman suit.
Now, that’s more like it.
No one is trying to take away from what Teyana has achieved, or how wonderful it is to have another strong, athletic female figure celebrated by other women. But do we gain anything by believing it is so easy to replicate?
Ironically, after telling the world that she doesn’t work out and eats whatever she wants, Teyana revealed on Twitter that she will soon be releasing a workout video in the coming months.
We can’t wait to see the accompanying diet plan! “Twinkies and all this s**t” anyone?
September 2, 201612:09pm